Week 7: Looking to Bounce Back

KANSAS CITY +5 over San Diego: I don't really have the logic to explain myself here. My head is saying I should pick San Diego. But, I hate the Bolts, and they really are not good. They haven't impressed me once so far this year. This Chiefs team seems to be growing more confident each week, and they haven't won at home yet. They're due. The way the Chargers have looked, I think the best case scenario for them this week is a 3 point win.


Indianapolis -13.5 over ST. LOUIS: The three team tease is back and more reliable than ever. The Colts should be at the top of your teaser flow chart every week. You don't even need to look at the matchup. It's like the new Velveeta version of Easy Mac. You can't go wrong.





Chicago +1 over CINCINNATI: The Bengals looked very ordinary last week, and I really don't think they're as good as that 4-2 record. The injury to Antwan Odom makes this game a lock for the Bears, who have impressed me even in their losses. Also, doesn't it seem like it would be smart to always tease an underdog against the Bengals? They seem to always win on the last minute, ensuring a small margin of victory, or they lose. Either way, with the tease, you're probably in good shape.



Green Bay -8.5 over CLEVELAND: The Browns suck, and they seem to be getting worse. I'm really not sure what else you want from me.



Minnesota +5.5 over PITTSBURGH: The Steelers have won 9 in a row at home, and they'll have Troy Polamalu, a major game changer, back in action. But, I just don't like that pass-happy offense against this Vikings defensive front. This could be a long day for Big Ben. The Vikings big wins (San Fran, Green Bay, and Baltimore) have come at the Metrodome. This will be their first major road contest (they've been at Cleveland, Detroit, and St. Louis). This win in Pittsburgh will be a major statement.



New England -15 over Tampa Bay: Last year I lost when I wagered on the London game. I expected the Giants to steamroll the Dolphins, but the rainy field in London made it just a three point game. But, after last week, I certainly can't justify taking Tampa because of weather considerations. The Patriots are building momentum.




San Francisco +3 over HOUSTON: Frank Gore is back, Glen Coffee has some experience under his belt, Michael Crabtree is in the starting lineup, and I love the Niners from this point forward. Plus, they are coming off a bye, and they were embarrassed their last time out. I can only imagine that the image of Mike Singletary's grundle is permanently burned into Dre Bly's memory after that one.




OAKLAND +6 over NY Jets: 6 points? really? The Jets have lost three straight, and haven't looked good doing it. Their head coach seems completely shell-shocked after these losses, and they're bringing a rookie quarterback into the black hole to face a tough defense. On the other hand, the Raiders seemed to have bounced back extremely well from the ass whooping the Giants put on them a couple of weeks ago. They just beat a team that was playing in the NFC championship game last year, their coach was just cleared of assault charges, their new stud defensive lineman has guaranteed they will make the playoffs, and their recently deceased players are coming back to the field as pigeons. Yeah, I like Oakland here.







Buffalo +7 over CAROLINA: I don't care if Ryan Fitzpatrick is playing quarterback or not. There is no reason for Carolina to be giving 7 to anybody besides St. Louis.



New Orleans -6.5 over At Miami: Miami is a very popular pick this week. I guess I understand it from the standpoint that the wildcat might neutralize the Saints pressure and Miami will chew up minutes. But, I will direct your attention back to Monday night in week 2. Miami perfectly executed their game plan, holding the ball for over three full quarters. And yet, despite having less then 15 minutes of possession, Peyton Manning was able to score his points quickly enough to win the game. The Saints can do the same thing.



DALLAS -4 over Atlanta: I love Dallas coming off the bye here. Some of you out there might be wondering what it's going to take for me to believe in the Falcons. I don't have an answer. Every week I'm wrong about them, and I'm still not convinced.



NY GIANTS -7 over Arizona: I wouldn't want to be the Cardinals this week. The Giants were embarrassed last week. They are better than they showed, and I'm sure they are itching to get back out on the field. They were getting blown out in the first half, and they still had a chance to make it a one possession game had it not been for Roman Harper's forced fumble.

CC Brown had the Roy Williams syndrome last week. He was so eager to play the run that he got roasted in the passing game. Of course I'd rather have Kenny Phillips. But Brown started in this league for 4 years with Houston, and I expect him to bounce back and at least play competently from here on out.



Philadelphia -7 over WASHINGTON: NFC East divisional matchups are always closer than you'd think. Were it not for the Eagles losing to Oakland last week, I might like the Skins here. But, like the Giants, I'm sure the Eagles have had a bad taste in their mouth all week.



Your Teaser of the Week:




10 point teaser:

Indy -3.5 over St. Louis, Green Bay +1 over Cleveland, and New England -5 over Tampa Bay.

Tuesday Heavy Metal...

Why the hell not? Enjoy your Tuesday with this semi-Ozzy tribute band and of course, some relatively new Slayer...

Tuesday Night Extravanganza

Friends, there is so much I wish to share with you tonight.

First, another wild weekend in the NFL much to the chagrin of the Guru. With my second consecutive 2 for 5 week of picks (although, having the Patriots cover the spread by 31 points is really alright with me, in fact I may have to pick against them in the future to continue my plan of reverse psychologizing them into a playoff spot) my grasp on plus .500 against the spread hangs tightly at 16-14 on the year.

As someone who associates with what one might consider "Wagering Gentlemen" I know firsthand that this season has proven difficult to say the least. (Sidenote: I have yet to meet a chick who has put money on a football game, although I find that extremely hot for some reason). But there is always fun in speculation and fun is what we are all about here at roomofzen.

In no particular order of importance:

1) The Patriots looked very good last night. The defense was playing with a swagger that I have not seen for quite sometime. Honestly, I expected the Broncos to put up a lot of points against the Pats secondary (which stepped up big time), and I thought that the New England offense would continue to struggle. Wrong on both counts. It didn't hurt that the Broncos defense was horrific at everything except sacking the quarterback. When the Pats D Line gets fired up there isn't a better more imposing defensive front in football. When they don't bring the intensity, they have been more or less average. I heard some interviews on WEEI today that confirmed a conscious effort on the part of the defense to play with what Richard Seymour called "A Sense of Purpose". Moving forward the Pats are going to have to adjust to competing without veteran safety and all around badass Rodney Harrison, who appears to be done for the season, and possibly for good. I'm going on record right now in the third paragraph of the Tuesday Night Extravaganza as saying that Harrison is deserving of a spot in the Hall Of Fame, for what its worth.

I suck at Photography, that's the Celtics I swear.

2) Over the weekend I had the opportunity to check out the Boston Celtics Open Practice at the Tsongas arena in Lowell. I had been to the Tsongas arena twice in my life. Once during a high school basketball tournament and the other time was to see a Korn concert. It was at this concert that I first sighted a man that became known simply as "The guy who wears the Undertaker costume and moshes" amongst my friends. For a good three years we saw this guy, who had a striking resemblance to the wrestler but was obviously not him, at every River Rave, Ozzfest, and rock concert we went too. Anyway, I hoped to see him there, instead I was graced with the presence of an uninspired Darius Miles. Let this be known: Darius Miles is a poor substitute for a guy who looks like the undertaker and wears the undertaker costume to concerts throughout Massachusetts. (Not surprisingly, Miles was released the next day). The team ran through some drills in front of a couple of thousand fans, did some defensive footwork, and then Doc gets on the microphone and thanks everyone for coming. That was about it. In all the practice lasted roughly 45 minutes.


In a striking show of solidarity, fans refused to leave the arena despite the pleas of ushers and venue staff who obviously had something to do Saturday afternoon repeatedly yelling at everyone to leave. I had hoped that by some stroke of luck the whole thing would consist of a game of knockout at one end of the court and a dunk contest at the other. Hey, dare to dream. I found the experience interesting, and it really drove home the fact that the defending world Champs would be taking the floor a week from tonight. Roomofzen will have several representatives at the game. I'm fucking pumped. Also, Perk looked lean and mean...lookout Eastern Conference bigmen.



3) It has been a while since we have received any reader questions for our sporadic "The Oracle Speaks", and this is a call for submissions. We're not begging here, but we all enjoy hearing from you. (This is my token "Its all about the Fans!" post of the month, but hey, it is.)







4) We have several new items in the Roomofzen store. As a reminder (for those of you who cannot read) we will be making a donation shortly to the American Cancer Society with proceeds from our merchandise sales. While our stuff isnt as popular as, say, the Vern Troyer sex tape, it is more family friendly and less likely to turn chicks off.







5) I was thinking about how unfortunate it is that Tony Kornheiser is a cohost of Monday night football. I really think that they miscast him for this role. Kornheiser doesn't have the humor or the football knowledge to occupy the third chair with the very talented and competent team of Tirico and Jaworski. I'm not calling for Dennis Miller or John Clayton to be the third guy (Miller clearly didn't work since comparisons between a good defensive play and some obscure piece of historical political trivia are essentially wasted on the audience (and generally NOT funny), and Clayton's insider knowledge would probably delve too deep to hold the interest of casual fans who make up a sizable portion of the target audience). Is this Tony's fault? Not really. There doesn't seem to be an established role for him. Should he tell a joke? Should he admit to knowing something about the game? Nobody seems to know, especially Kornheiser. This has led to the excruciating "explain the obvious at all costs" technique that is becoming his staple. This works for Madden, but Madden also really knows the game of football. I love Kornheiser on PTI, and most people would agree that he does an excellent job there, but MNF is clearly not his scene. SO....

It is time to move on. And seeing as how I have got my soapbox I am going to recommend comedian Artie Lange to be the new third wheel for Monday Night Football. Anyone who listens to Howard Stern knows Lange. Some may even recall some of his fine films "Dirty Work" and "Beer League". Sure he is a recovering Heroin addict and admitted gambler but I think he could shine in this role. He has a good knowledge of sports in general and would actually be funny. That's my vote. I'm sure that network executives are at this moment totally involved in not giving a fuck what I think.





Finally, Roomofzen is coming closer and closer to obtaining Podcast technology. Once the stars have aligned we will be taking our little blog here to the next level. Just imagine listening to LaRocque and I going over our weekly picks while riding the T next to a hot coed. She will be thinking, "man I bet that guy is listening to something really badass". She will be right. Also, she will find you irresistible. Tell her you know all about the Babcock Report and Foil in the Oven. Chicks totally go for that stuff. Those chicks pictured above are avid readers, otherwise I definitely wouldn't post a picture of them on this site.








Rock and Roll.

Roomofzen Deportes: World Class Player in LA

For those people who do not know, there is a world class soccer player who now is involved in the MLS. He is known for great hairdos, facial hair and is an icon throughout the world. His name is not David Beckham.


His name is Ruud Gullit and he is the coach of the LA Galaxy. He was voted the best player in the world twice in the late 80's and if he was playing now in his prime he would have had much more of an effect on MLS soccer.

For non fans of soccer, the expectations for David Beckham were way too great for the type of player he is. He was never going to take over a game like Pele use to be able to or someone of Gullit's talent. This is not to say David Beckham is not good at soccer, he is just VERY good at specific things, such as free kicks, corners and crossing the ball. He is not the type of player who could dribble past 5 players or do a bicycle kick that would grab the attention of the common sports fan. He could be compared to Peja Stojakovic of the NBA. He can shoot three pointers superbly but he is not a type of player who is going to take over a game by himself. He needs players that can get him the ball when he is open. Ruud Gullit took over games and was a maestro of the soccer field.

David Beckham is more known for his marriage to former pop singer and spice girl, Victoria Beckham than his soccer skills. He has become one of the richest athletes in the world because of his hairdos and personal style. But seriously look at the mustache and dreads Ruud Gullit had when he played. Fohawks will go out of style (hopefully soon) but a great mustache never will not to mention sick dreads!




Americans don't understand that in England David Beckham is often the center of jokes and is on covers of many gay magazines. Surely as can been seen Ruud has much more timeless sex appeal than Beckham, he should be the one that is getting all the media attention. I will leave you with a video of Ali G making fun of Posh Spice and David Beckham at a charity event.

Suns-Spurs

For those of you who stayed up last night to watch the Suns-Spurs game, you'll probably agree with the following observations:

1. Amare Stoudemire crapped his pants last night. He scored 20 points in the first half and then virtually disappeared in the second, going completely ice cold from the field. In the first half he was making outside jumpers, fade-aways, and his patent slash and dunk plays to the rim. It was awesome to watch and I think he went 9/11. In the second half, however, he just kept throwing up bricks, going 0/6 in the third quarter and eventually scoring a few more points. What gives?

2. The Suns looked like Denver last night: A lot of scoring, a lot of pizazz, but virtually no defense. The result: Parker and Ginobili had clear paths to the rim the entire night, and made the Suns suffer. My sense is that the Suns coaching staff told their team to lay off the fouls last night. Shaq and Amare stayed out of foul trouble and the paint was virtually uncontested for the Spurs perimeter players. But this strategy backfired because the Spurs play good defense and completely shut down the Suns on offense. For this strategy to work, your team has to match the points you're giving up on defense.

3. Ginobili is a soulless robot. He actually looks like an alien, cold and emotionless, just sitting there on the bench doing math problems in his head. He rarely shows emotion, let alone a smile or even a scowl. His 6th Man of the Year award really drove this point home: he couldn't even smile or say thank you for the award when they handed it to him. At least look like you're happy, you damn fool!
4. Nash had a horrendous game and the Spurs completely shut him down. The best example of this was the way the Spurs shut down Nash's feeder passes from the top of the arc. Every time Nash brought the ball down court, Bowen and Parker smothered him and denied his initial passes or pick and roll opportunities. The result was Nash doing those stupid behind-the-back passes to Amare which he couldn't handle.

5. Shaq is still out of shape and after 22 minutes, he looked gassed and lethargic. The Suns need to do a better job managing his minutes so he doesn't flame out in the 3rd quarter like he did last night.

6. Down 17 with 4 minutes left to play, I still thought the Suns could make it a game...and they did, but ended up losing anyway. Very frustrating to watch.

7. Diaw and Barbossa had terrible games, and for the Suns to get back into this series, they'll need help from these players.