Week 3 Picks: Random 90s TV Show Edition

Here are the Roomofzen Picks for week 3...after a slow start we are looking to pick things up.  First we have to acknowledge that we are not worthy of using a theme such as Greg Lloyd until performance improves, hence this weeks theme of early 90s TV shows that I may or may not have watched occasionally featuring girls I may or may not have humped my couch to.  Also, the picks will be made to rhyme. 

Tennessee + 2.5 @ New York Jets:

The Titans getting 2.5, surely you must be joking,

Rex Ryan's eating candy bars... oh no I think hes choking!

Alas they beat New England, but I think they are a fluke,

If I knew where Mark Sanchez lived, you can bet I'd hide the Duke.

Houston -4 vs Jacksonville

For the last two weeks this season, I've spent some time a waitin

For the appearance of a running back- the one they call Steven Slaton

Jack Del Rio may call to mind a sideline Charlie Bronson,

But the Jags won't stop the Texans, especially Andre Johnson.

Philadelphia -9 vs KC

It won't even make a difference-  Ty Thigpen or Matt Cassel,

KC won't make this close at all ,it will barely be a hassle

If Kolb starts to struggle, we just might see Mike Vick,

Westbrook, McCoy, and Jackson, The Eagles O is sick.

Baltimore -13.5 vs Cleveland

I think this is the year that the Browns turn things around,

No I don't, I'm only kidding, they're the biggest joke in town.

The Ravens D is playing well, thats really all they need,

And seriously is there anyone more badass than Ed Reed?

New York Giants -7 @ Tampa Bay

The Giants are really rolling, two good wins to start,

Tampa's got no Quarterback and I just ripped a fart.

In fact even on the road I'm surprised its only seven,

Does anybody out there know what became of Dorsey Levens?

Detroit -6.5 vs Washington

The Lions have some talent, I guess that much is true,

And I want to pick this upset, honestly I do.

I think the Redskins blow this one, despite playing solid D,

But the Lions are so due to win, it makes me have to pee.

Green Bay - 6.5  @ St. Louis

The Packers are a solid team, they're going to win this game

On the road or in Green Bay, its really all the same.

The Rams have Steven Jackson, but it really aint enough,

I heard that Aaron Rodgers loves a hairy muff.

San Francisco +7 @ Minnesota

I wouldn't eat food at Friendly's, in fact I'd rather starve,

And I'd rather wax my asshole than put money on Brett Favre.

The 49ers have some juice, so I'm going to take a chance,

I love a team whose coach is known for taking off his pants.

New England -4 vs. Atlanta

The offense it has struggled, the point production poor,

But lose two games back to back? it aint been done before.

The Falcons they are a decent team, in fact they are quite good,

But will win this game I say-- Giselle she gives me wood.

Chicago -2 @ Seattle

The Bears head out west this week, to the land of rain and grunge,

Does anybody anymore use a spermicidal sponge?

Forte has a breakout game, I think this one's a lock,

I wish I had a hundred grand and a 12 inch cock.

New Orleans -6 @ Buffalo

The Saints can score with ease, some would say at will,

If TO doesn't catch a score there'll be one unhappy Bill.

I know the meltdowns coming, I can feel it in the air,

New Orleans might hang 50 and I still might not care.

San Diego - 6 Vs Miami

San Diego can put up the points, and I hate Phillip Rivers,

And Merriman is a dirtbag, and Darren Sproles delivers.

Miami is a year away...we've heard that one before,

I've also read somewhere that Tia Tequilla is a whore.

Cinci +4 Vs Pittsburgh

The Steelers running game it blows, and Polamalus out,

Cinci has some talent, of that there is no doubt.

Big Ben will turn it over, that same old tale again,

Chris Henry looks exactly like a Roswell alien.

Denver pk @ Oakland

Who Cares!

Indy +2.5 @ Arizona I think the Colts are solid, though they struggled Monday night,

Peyton has some weapons, and man is that guy white!

I laugh at his commercials, he plays a real good tool,

Kurt Warners wife is hot now, man am I a fool!

Dallas -9.5  vs Carolina

Lose twice at Jerry's palace, you know it can't be done,

The Boys are back in town they say, Panthers on the run.

Delhomme is mighty shitty, they used to call him good,

Tony Romo dumped Jess Simpson cause she gained 47 pounds. Haha. Yes.