The Manny Ramirez Trade

The vindictive part of me says, "Good luck hitting in Chavez Ravine. Say hi to Nomar. You two deserve each other. And I'd bet my life against you getting another $100 million dollar deal." Of course I don't really feel that way. The funny thing is I was always one of the most ardent Manny/Nomar supporters, right up until the day they were traded. And even after both trades I couldn't quite believe it. However, both punched their tickets out of town. With Nomar it was the infamous sit on the bench and sulk incident in Yankee Stadium. That was complicated by the fact that Derek Jeter, the shortstop he was at one time most frequently compared to, dove head first into the stands. With Manny it's not so simple. Did he take three strikes on purpose in New York? Maybe. However, he definitely said he'd play in Iraq, pushed the traveling secretary*, sat out a few mysterious games recently (one of which was against the hated Yankees), blatantly dogged it at times in the Angels series, mixed it up with Kevin Youkilis on the bench, was slow to join his teammates in the Coco Crisp/Rays brawl, and said the organization did not deserve him. In fact Manny's been so bizarre that this post by Babcock made complete sense to me.

Of course the question has to be asked, "Did the Red Sox organization and its fans bring about this development by enabling Ramirez with the Manny being Manny movement?" I'd say yes and no. There's no denying the fact that Ramirez was enabled. Guys should run hard and be focused on defense, although I'd argue that Manny was never as bad an outfielder as some people would have you believe. And the bulk of Red Sox Nation either accepted or championed Ramirez's eccentric ways. At the same time a crucial part of the Manny being Manny line of thinking was that he was one of the most feared bats in baseball. Look at his stats from last year. Or consider how many fastballs were blown by him this year. Can he still get it done? Maybe. He may go on an absolute tear in LA over the next two months and make those Bay/Ramirez comparison seem absolutely ludicrous. Or he could be just average. Either way, unlike the Nomar/Orlando Cabrera trade the Sox did not get a clearly better player in return this time around.


Of course it's important to consider ownership/management's role in all of this. LaRocque got the ball rolling with a post about a meeting Manny was promised that never happened. On top of that there's no denying the fact that three of the four biggest stars in recent Red Sox history - Nomar, Pedro, and Manny (with David Ortiz being the 4th, currently unaffected by all of this) - have left the team on bad terms. And if Curt Schilling were not such an ass I'd probably work him into that argument as well. It's difficult because the Red Sox are up against a philosophy in baseball where guys get paid for what they have done, not what they are going to do. That may be changing but it's nowhere near the mindset NFL teams operate under. Meanwhile, if we've learned anything from the success of the Red Sox, Patriots, and Celtics it has to be that winning leads to difficult decisions and players getting overpaid, by the hometown team or someone else. Furthermore, Manny, Pedro and Nomar were on the wrong side of their careers. Can you imagine if Pedro were still in Boston given his extensive injury history as Met and diminishing stuff? Yet those guys were not dumb. They saw Theo Epstein and company completely turn off some of the biggest stars the organization has ever known and simultaneously give ridiculous contracts to Matt Clement, Edgar Renteria, Julio Lugo, and J.D. Drew. In fact Manny recently came out and said the former, "The Red Sox did the same with guys like Nomar Garciapara, and Pedro Martinez, and now they do the same with me. Their goal is to paint me as the bad guy. I love Boston fans, but the Red Sox don't deserve me. I'm not talking about money. Mental peace has no price, and I don't have peace here." If that's not reminiscent of the time Dr. Dre fled Suge Knight and Death Row records for peace of mind, leaving his all-important master recordings behind in the process, then nothing is.

In then end both sides are to blame. Ramirez's behavior over the last month or so was inexcusable. Yet I'd argue that ownership and management have a tendency to act in arrogant ways. It's definitely one of those trades that made me wonder if I'm too old to care about sports this much. With everything that's going on in the world right now why should the goings on of a bunch of wealthy people living the dream have a major impact on me?

Six closing points:

1. It's odd that Ramirez will now play for Joe Torre after all these years. Say what you want about Ramirez's production in his glory days but I couldn't picture him playing for the Yankees dynasty. Would he really have pulled a Johnny Damon and tried to fit in?

2. Will this go down as the ultimate example of the addition by subtraction philosophy? Consider how much the Red Sox hate getting rid of prospects. Yet they dealt Craig Hansen and Brandon Moss. I'll pass on trying to determine their ceilings as players. In addition, the Red Sox will pay the remaining $7 million on Ramirez's contract. And when did these trade talks start? Remember the Marlins deal fell apart. It appears as if the Red Sox scrambled to beat the deadline. Add it all up and it screams of just wanting to get a guy out of town.

3. This whole thing has a Lakers/Shaq/Kobe feel to it. Ugh.

4. You have to wonder what if any role the Boston media and fans played in all of this. I would grow tired of certain prominent reporters real quick. And the hours upon hours of phone calls to sports talk radio can't help either. Overall the level of scrutiny, this blog post included, is outrageous.

5. It's unfair to put all the blame for Boston's recent struggles on Manny. The Red Sox have other issues right now (relief pitching, hitting in general come to mind). Still I can't imagine playing on a team with a guy making $20 million that does not go hard. So I'm intrigued by how the other players respond. Remember they did not exactly mourn Nomar's departure.

6. Speaking of focusing on Manny. All that and I didn't even touch on Jason Bay. He's not going to know what hit him. He's going from baseball irrelevance (the Pirates have a 15-year losing streak) right into the chaos that is Red Sox baseball. I'd be ecstatic if the Sox just landed the 2005 Jason Bay. As is I'll wait and see.

* I'm guilty of making every excuse under the sun for Manny. Yet even I was appalled by the "hey the traveling secretary is 60 but he's not a frail, close to death invalid" argument that made the rounds. My dad is 60, works out, can handle himself, and I'm still a little afraid of him. Still if a professional athlete in his mid 30s took a run at him I'd be furious and unforgiving.

Foil in the Oven: I Wanna Be Sedated

Sitting in the bleachers at Fenway last night, I couldn't help but feel like I was watching all hope for a post-season run go down the tubes as I watched the team completely implode, and I felt a sense of backlash from the fans that I can't ever remember feeling before. Hopefully it will pass. At least football season is getting closer....


Here come the rest of my AFC picks, but first................

This video is amazing (courtesy of Ball Don't Lie via Awful Announcing , and Fan House) This is part of a movie trailer parody contest at ibeatyou.com




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AFC SOUTH:

In my opinion, this is the second best division in the NFL (a close second to the NFC East). The Colts and Jaguars seem like bonafide playoff teams, while the Titans defense is too good to ignore. On top of that, the Texans appear to be on the rise.




First of all, I don't expect Peyton Manning's knee recovery to have any major effect on the Colts. In fact, there is not a team in the NFL that is built to handle a setback like this as well as the Colts are. First of all, you know that Peyton Manning is going to do everything that he needs to do in order to be ready to play. It may mean spending extra time watching film, or it may mean taking extra reps with his receivers once he is back. It will probably require both. Either way, I'm sure he has already laid out a very clear plan for himself. Second, he's going to be throwing to Marvin Harrison, Reggie Wayne, Dallas Clark, and Anthony Gonzalez. Aside from Gonzalez, he has been working with those guys long enough that it shouldn't take long for them to get back on track.

So, as strange as it seems to say given the fact that their starting quarterback is missing significant preseason time, I have no questions about the Colts offense this year. They are stacked again, and they may be more dangerous than ever before. All the question marks come on defense. Mainly, can Dwight Freeney and Bob Sanders stay healthy? The answer will determine exactly how high the playoff ceiling is for this team. Even if they do suffer some injuries on defense, this is my pick to win the AFC South.



I'm not quite as high on the Jaguars as most people seem to be. Given their performance last season, they have certainly earned the right to be on everybody's radar. Overall, it seems like people are most sold on Jacksonville's defense and on Jack Del Rio as a head coach. I think it's certainly a good team, but there are a lot of question marks for me. I think Marcus Stroud was a huge loss. I expect him to have a huge impact on Buffalo's defense, and I think the Jags will feel his absence. This team has a whole lot of offensive potential, but I have too many questions about the players on the team to sell myself on them. Fred Taylor's health is obviously going to be a concern, and I'm not confident endorsing the Taylor/Jones-Drew tandem unless I know that Taylor will be healthy. I need to see another strong year from David Garrard before I can really feel confident. And, the receiving core, like the whole offense, has potential to be great but I'm shaky on them. Jerry Porter, Troy Williamson, Matt Jones, Dennis Northcutt, these guys are all talented. But, I have my doubts.

It's hard for me to put my finger on exactly why I have so much trouble trusting this Jags team. David Garrard threw for 18 touchdowns and only 3 interceptions last season. That statistic in itself should put my questions about him to rest. It also means that I'll most likely be proven wrong.





The Titans are a team that I always love to watch. This year won't be any different.
At this point, there's no way to predict what will happen with that offense. However, what I do know is that this is a very strong defensive unit. In bringing Jevon Kearse back, the Titans have created what could end up being the best defensive line in the NFL (if Kearse can stay healthy, of course). Kearse, Kyle Vanden Bosch, and of course Albert Haynesworth are enough to give any offensive coordinator nightmares during the week leading up to a matchup with Tennessee. Add in a linebacking group that includes David Thornton and Keith Bulluck, and a secondary that sports Chris Hope and Michael Griffin at the safety spots and you've got a defense that could (but most likely won't) put Tennessee back in the postseason.

The Texans aren't there yet. Andre Johnson is great. Ahman Green is what he is at this point (which is old and injury prone but still adequate). I'm intrigued by Steve Slaton. In Amobi Okoye, Mario Williams, DeMeco Ryans, and Dunta Robinson, Houston has a core of your defensive players that should help this unit exceed a lot of people's expectations. But, this division is too good. The ceiling for the Texans is a third place finish, and that's if Tennessee's offense goes completely to hell.

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AFC WEST:

I hate to do this. I tried to make it work out differently. Unfortunately, no matter how many times I tweaked the intricate algorithms of the Roomofzen Super Computer, the results were always the same. And here they are:

This division sucks. But, it houses what I believe to be the best team in the NFL. I can't stand the San Diego Chargers. Back in the days of Stan Humphries, Natrone Means, Shawn Jefferson, and Alfred Pupunu, I had no problems with this team. They were actually very likeable (and it was hard to watch the 49ers just rip them to shreds in the Super Bowl). My contempt for them began back when LaDanian Tomlinson was dubbed "LT", and it has grown steadily since.

It's not just me. There are a lot of football fans out there with no ties to Lawrence Taylor who hate the Chargers. But, in San Diego, there seems to be nothing but optimism and anticipation. The Chargers are confident, and they possess a certain swagger that is the distinct mark of a good team. The fact that they have grown so unpopular with the masses is probably most indicative of how strong a team they have become.

Before I talk about why they are so good, let me first make this quick statement. During the 2006-2007 NFL season, people all over the national media were proclaiming Philip Rivers to be a better quarterback than Eli Manning. Now, the Giants gave up a lot for Manning, especially when you look at what those draft picks became (Shawne Merriman, Nate Kaeding, and Roman Oben (via trade with Tampa). But, the Giants just won the Super Bowl. I am very happy with the trade. Philip Rivers would have been a horrible fit in New York. His volatile personality would have just added more negativity to a lockerroom that was already bursting apart at the seams. I believe Manning is a better quarterback than Rivers, and I think that will show more than ever this year. Ok, now I feel like I can praise the Chargers.

This team is solid in every single area of the game. They have the single most dangerous offensive weapon in football at running back. Adding Chris Chambers makes a passing game that's difficult to stop (Chambers, Antonio Gates, Vincent Jackson, and Tomlinson out of the backfield). The offensive line (anchored by Marcus McNeill and Nick Hardwick) is very strong. On top of that, this offense has now has one full season with Norv Turner's system under their belts. I don't expect them to start slowly like last season.

As scary as the San Diego offense is, the defense may be even scarier. Shawne Merriman, Jamal Williams, Luis Castillo, Shaun Phillips, Matt Willhelm, Antonio Cromartie, Quentin Jammer, this defense is loaded. You can't run on them when they are healthy, and they showed in last year's postseason that they can't be thrown on either (remember how they made Peyton Manning and Tom Brady look).

When you look up and down the roster of the Chargers, it's hard to think of another team that is as talented. On top of that, this team seemed to take a huge step forward last season. It was ugly early on. They fell flat on their faces despite huge expectations. And then we had to listen to LaDanian whine at all the press conferences. I guess they hit rock bottom wheh Tomlinson and Rivers had their little spat on the sideline (a personal highlight for me). But, they worked through it, and seemed to emerge a much better and more unified team at the end of the season. They played their best football of the year in the playoffs (I don't want to pour salt in the wounds of Patriots' fans, but that was a close AFC championship game and the result may have been different with a healthy Tomlinson). I expect them to continue this high level of play as they enter this season.

The Chargers are my pick to win the AFC West, and my pick to represent the AFC in the Super Bowl......that was horrible. Now I'm in a bad mood. I don't even want to waste my time breaking down the rest of this division. I'll give you the Reader's Digest version:

2nd place: Oakland (Much improved. I like JaMarcus Russell a lot. I also like Lane Kiffin. Combine that with an owner that spends wrecklessly with no concern for his teams long term cap situation and you have a big turnaround.)
3rd place: Denver (They didn't get any better)
4th place: Kansas City (They really suck. I think the Dolphins are better than them. Not the Falcons though. The Falcons suck more.)

So, here is my AFC playoff picture

1- San Diego
2- New England
3- Indianapolis
4- Pittsburgh
x5- Jacksonville
x6- Baltimore

Something Ain't Right in Boston...

The Sox are playing awful and that 6th inning was some of the worst defense I've ever seen.

The Greatest Concert Ever...

...In Newburyport, Massachusetts.

Usually when I go to the grocery store it is to pick up turkey, maybe some cherries, and to check out hot moms. Generally, it is not where my mind is blown. But my mind was blown when exiting the Market Basket in Newburyport last week I noticed a flyer for a concert at Newburyport High School on August 15th. The musical act: Steve Earle.

I have been a fan of Steve Earle since I heard my first SE song. Furthermore I have been scouring the internet for concert dates nearby so that I could get to one of his shows for the past several months. I have looked online everytime that I have to travel out of town for work, thinking that maybe just one time I would be in the right place at the right time. At least, I thought, at some point he will be in the Boston area. Eventually, I gave up.

But, there it was on the flyer. Steve Earle: Live at the Newburyport High School Theatre. I couldn't help but laugh. I immediately went home and bought tickets. (You can get them here if you're interested).

For those of you who don't know, Newburyport is not exactly a typical stop on an East Coast tour for a well known and critically acclaimed musical act. To the best of my knowledge the "biggest" band to have played here was Nickelcreek, who played at the annual Yankee Homecoming Festival a few years ago. Also, once a few of my friends told me that The Kinks were playing downtown for some reason and I believed them for a few days. The Kinks have never played a concert in Newburyport, and never will.

Anyway, I am fucking pumped and will have a full concert review for you all following the show. For now, suck on this:

Mister T

I've always been a huge Mr. T fan, going all the way back to the A-Team and Rocky Three. Now Snickers has the good sense to put him on TV, offending just about everyone and angering the media. Enjoy the following ad:

Rush wants the Rams..

I'm not going to lie -- having Rush Limbaugh own the Rams would be undeniably awesome. Putting aside his political views for a minute, he would bring a myriad of benefits to the league and its fans:

- He would be like Mark Cuban on steroids, arguing or complaining about referees on his radio show. He could even talk shit about other owners or the NFL and have people listen. Some people don't like this, but I do. The refs need to be held accountable since the league doesn't do much here.

- He would spark interest in the Rams by touting them on his radio show which accesses 3-6 million people. Again, this would increase publicity and interest in the league, and give you a reason to hear his show.

- He could trade for Donovan McNabb or another black quarterback! Imagine that...

- He could move the team to Palm Beach when the Dolphins decide to leave (assuming Parcels doesn't turn the team or the franchise around).

- He would become a massive PR hound for the NFL and he would piss off a lot of people, leading to controversey and extended coverage.

Some Thoughts on Guys With Dreadlocks

Rob Bradford had a great piece in the Herald today about Manny. The following excerpts really stood out to me :

on the issue of the team option (note that Legacy is the organization that handled Ramirez' affairs before Scott Boras):

"Still focused on the uncertainty of his future, according to Ramirez’ camp, the slugger was ensured by Red Sox president/CEO Larry Lucchino that some sort of meeting would take place after last season. However, no such meeting occurred, with Sox general manager Theo Epstein again explaining to Legacy that the team wasn’t ready to make any definitive decisions regarding Ramirez."

This makes it a little easier to understand why Manny might be upset about the way things have been handled. It also might explain some of his more cryptic statements such as "Asked what he meant my ‘Enough is enough,’ Ramirez said, 'They know. You have to ask Theo and John Henry. They know.'" It might also give a concrete example of that whole they say one thing to your face and do another thing Ramirez was talking about.

If Manny went to ownership at the end of last season in search of some sort of meeting as to what the club was thinking in regard to his contract situation, was promised by Lucchino that a meeting would take place, and then denied that courtesy, it makes it much easier to understand his frustration. If we heard this story from a non-celebrity at a more conventional job, we'd say that they have every right to be upset. Clearly their company does not value them very much as an employee.

Dale and Holley addressed this today, and said that Theo is the one who put a stop on the meeting. They said that it is part of a long trend in which he refuses to allow ownership to intrude on baseball matters. He wants to handle the baseball side of things, and they handle the business side. That Lucchino and John Henry sign the checks, and therefore should have as much involvement as they want is undeniable but unimportant here. The fact is that, as good of a job as Theo has done of bringing talent in, he has not always done the best job of keeping up relations with players while they are here. Johnny Damon and Pedro Martinez come to mind. Now, the club didn't really want to re-sign those guys. They may feel the same way about Manny, and it is very easy for them to spin it as "this was all Manny's doing." Well, that's probably not the case.

I'm not trying to excuse Manny here. But, I think we tend to place all blame on him because of who he is. In this case, it seems like the blame may be more shared than we originally believed. Professional athletes are pampered. It's true. But, requesting to meet with a team in the off-season to discuss your contract certainly does not seem like an unreasonable request.


Another part that stuck out to me:

"Take, for example, the fact that Manny Ramirez [stats] has told some of his confidants that doctors diagnosed his right knee with what was 'probably tendinitis.' The Red Sox [team stats], however, have made no such statement......................"It was a relationship that only worsened when Ramirez took offense to the fact that the Sox didn’t believe his right knee was truly injured. He has told some that the ailment was tendinitis, which a team-issued MRI (that came up clean on both knees) might not pick up. Sox officials did not comment last night when asked about the alleged tendinitis diagnosis, reiterating Epstein’s pledge not to discuss the Ramirez situation on or off the record."

Again, not excusing Manny. But, I think that we should all remember that things are not usually as one-sided as most people in the media have made this whole thing out to be.

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From Tim Graham of ESPN.com on Ricky Williams:

"Of the many adjectives applicable to Williams, "dependable" hasn't been one of them. So far, however, the former Heisman Trophy winner and NFL rushing king has been the definition of responsible.

The front office and coaches have raved about his offseason dedication. Parcells has taken a particular shine to him because of Williams' commitment to the conditioning program. Williams has been explosive and focused in open workouts.

He hasn't rushed for 1,000 yards since 2003, but he looks as though he could do it again. He's 31 years old with low mileage, having carried only 283 times (more than a third of those in the CFL) over the past five years."

- While the quarterback controversy sorts itself out, Ricky Williams and Ronnie Brown could be a dangerous duo on the ground.

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And, sticking with the theme:

Random Media Thoughts

ESPN is pushing Rick Reilly so aggressively that it is reminiscent of the way the WWF or the WCW operated after signing a big name wrestler away from one another.

- Both LaRocque and Babcock recently commented upon how frustrating it is to listen to almost every show on WEEI, other than Dale and Holley. I'm on board with that. In fact I've almost entirely replaced sports talk radio with a number of daily podcasts. However, there is one point I want to make. It does not bother me so much that the Big Show operates as it does. I just can't get over the fact that it is so popular.

- I don't need people to talk during the home run contest. In fact if they just played some good music and let guys hit home runs I'd be all set.

- That last point brings me to a bigger issue. Over the last several years we've seen an explosion of blogs. I'd attribute this to two developments:

1. The technology has developed to the point that anyone can get an opinion out there. Attracting readers and building a following is tough, yet not impossible.

2. In general people know a lot about sports. We're not talking high-end physics, game theory, or internal medicine here. A lot of my friends have played competitive sports almost their entire lives. So when guys like Peter Vecsey (listen to the Bill Simmons podcast when he was a guest) act like they are bigger than the games, it gets old fast. Along those lines I don't mind that Chris Berman is a caricature of himself at this point as he gets by entirely on his schtick. It is what it is. I only ask that he stops pretending to accurately predict the picks on NFL draft day when we all know someone is telling him who will go. That's a reasonable request.

Ultimately the blogging revolution has sent the message that people from all walks of life can contribute insightful, well thought out arguments, opinions, and coverage. As people have increasingly found their own voices ESPN has throw more talking heads at us. On occasion this works. I consistently learn from Ron Jaworski and Peter Gammons. However, their work is rare. In reality a lot of us are simply looking for highlights from ESPN. You know like back in the mid 90s. Yet as several members of ROOMOFZEN have previously noted, SportsCenter is hard to watch. This is difficult for guys in their mid to late 20s who used to consider it one of their favorite shows. This is not intended to be an "ESPN sucks rant" of which there are plenty already. To be fair I read ESPN.com a lot, consider ESPN news a good source of highlights, crack a smile when one of the anchors says, “(insert baseball player’s name) has 99 problems but a pitch ain’t one” after a home run, and realize that ESPN does a lot of things well. Having said all that I was disappointed in a few of the network's decisions:

5. Network policy that prevents employees from appearing on non-ESPN radio shows. Come on now.

4. Probably 2 summers ago now, SportsCenter ran some fake press conferences where Steve Phillips pretended to be a GM for MLB teams and answered questions about what those teams needed to do. I distinctly remember Buster Olney waving in a crowd of journalists and asking questions. This is ironic because Olney is a real journalist and a good one at that. As a side note Olney’s full name is Robert Stansbury Olney III. I’ll be honest I don’t see the Buster thing. The nickname Buster should be reserved for guys like Vince Wilfork. By the way if you don’t believe me or I didn’t explain it that well – read this.

3. SportsCenters’s day in every American state. Probably happened 2 summers ago too.

2. The TitleTown campaign that is going on as I type this.

1. The death of Baseball Tonight. I recognize that Peter Gammons had to step away for health reasons. And the whole Harold Reynolds situation was a debacle. Regardless that show is not what it used to be. I could go on but this does the trick.

Ultimately these examples are in line with the direction of the network. And much like WEEI, ESPN is as popular as ever. So I don't know what to say.

Some Friday Links

This week's anticipated preview of the AFC South and West will have to be delayed until next week while I enter the new data on Peyton Manning's knee into our roomofzen super computer. However, I will complete my AFC predictions for you early next week. In the meantime, here are some Friday links:

1) Charles Barkley helps a busboy out with his tuition , from Ball Don't Lie via the Philadelphia Daily News : It's no secret that we love Chuck here at roomofzen. He was my favorite player in his prime, and he is still in my top 5 of all time. I've only had one real life encounter with him, in which he had me thrown out of a bar, and that still stands out as one of the best memories of my life. People have been coming down a little bit heavy on Chuck lately, but for what? His gambling issues don't mean anything about him as a person. And, I think it's refreshing to have a genuine and honest guy like him out there. I love this story.





2) Thanks to Smokey for sending over this NPR story on the kid who, despite being too young to know what was going on, was seen naked by millions of people all over the world on the cover of Nirvana's Nevermind.



3) Ted sent us this hilarious deadspin story about the Beijing games.


4) Nice piece by Bernie Lincicome of the Rocky Mountain News on the recently retired Rod Smith.


5) Hilarious piece from the Sports Pickle (no link so I'll just paste it in). If you have followed the Giants closely, then you'll know that this hits the relationship between Eli Manning and Jeremy Shockey (or, at least the way the relationship was perceived by the public) dead on. :

" Former New York Giants tight end Jeremy Shockey stopped by the team’s facility one last time on Monday to say his goodbyes to his ex-teammates before departing for New Orleans. He also made sure to pull Eli Manning’s underwear deep into the quarterback’s anus one last time.
“Oh, Eli, you stupid, little dork,” Shockey said, ripping Manning’s underwear strap up over his head. “I know I gave you a hard time. But I’m going to miss trying to jump for your overthrown passes and giving you wedgies and shoving your head in floater-filled toilets. You suck and I hate you. But it was all in good fun, you stupid queer.”
Manning says he has mixed feelings about Shockey’s departure.
“You hate to lose good players,” he said. “But I think I’ll play better without him yelling at me all the time. Not to mention that I’ll have less bleeding anal wounds to play through. The other fellas give me wedgies, of course, but not as much as Jeremy did.” "



6) The pope this week urged young people to spurn materialism. I'm not disagreeing with him, but it seems like quite a request coming from a man who dresses like this:





7) Despite this report in the Onion , the Brewers seem to be on a roll right now. They finished off a perfect 7-0 road trip last night, and are right on the Cubs heels.



8) Finally, here is more on the planned Dimebag Darrell tribute from the Headbanger's Blog . Scroll down to see Ted's post yesterday with the official Ozzfest press release. None of us have Ozzfest tickets. But, if any readers make it to the show, please send in your words on how the tribute was, and we'll get them up. We'd like to hear setlists, and any special words that were said. Pictures and videos would also be great.

Also, make sure you go down a few posts and read Babcock's piece on Hagerstown, MD.

Have a sick weekend.

Well Done Reebok

It's closer than you think...

Burger King Commercials

I'm always somewhat hesitant to post on ROOMOFZEN because I don't want to bump the last post down. Essentially make sure you read about Babock's trip to Hagerstown, Maryland. But I digress. If you haven't seen Burger King's recent ad campaign for the Steakhouse...well you should. I enjoyed this one. But right now the following one, despite the poor quality on YouTube, is the leader in the clubhouse:



Two lines in particular killed me:

1. "...It may support life."

2. "You arrogant punk."

Of course this led me to a couple of other commercials, which I am assuming are foreign.



For some reason I got a kick out of those.

Finally, I was reminded of the greatness of YouTube as those commercials somehow led to this. That kid is a winner.

Hagerstown, Maryland and the American Dream

If you love America you will buy this shirt at Wolfparadise.com.

Every time I get sent out of town to work I get a little excited. I enjoy traveling to different places, and given the nature of my work, these places tend to be random and certainly not ones I would consider traveling to on my own dime. So, instead of thinking to myself, “Well, I will be microwaving dinners and listening to creepy old guys fucking prostitutes through the walls for the next week or two”, I try to turn my thoughts to the possibility of enlightenment in these strange new places.

Furthermore, I enjoy traveling in the United States. I can appreciate the importance of obtaining international experiences, but to me a road trip across the US is infinitely more appealing than backpacking through Europe. That’s just me. For one, I don’t speak any other languages (I ended my career in German on a bitter note: My senior year in High School our class wrote, directed, and acted a stage adaptation of “Back To The Future” which used characters from the founding of Germany thousands of years ago…in one of the most egregious and shameful displays by a judging panel we lost a Massachusetts High School German Theatre competition due to the fact that none of the judges had ever seen ‘Back To The Future’ even though every other person who saw our play unequivocally called it the greatest piece of theatre they had ever seen). So, for better or worse, I appreciate being able to converse in my native tongue when I am away from home.

I will not bore you with the details of my assignment in Hagerstown, MD, I will simply try to capture as clearly as possible some things and experiences that stood out to me during this brief journey south. In doing so, perhaps we will all come to a better understanding of why I have disappeared off the face of the earth for a few weeks now.

On the ride down to Maryland I turned to my Lebanese associate and said, this trip is going to be great, sarcastically, and then added, Man, we are just gonna be living the dream down here. It quickly became our go-to phrase of the trip: Standing around in a line at a Martin’s grocery store waiting to buy yogurt and deli meats behind a 20 year old mother of three with two forearm tattoos of what appear to be a Unicorn and a Panther…Livin the dream. Waking up at 530 am and hacking our way through brush with machetes and finding ticks on our stomachs….Livin the dream. Our initial grabbing onto of the phrase was later confirmed as a prescient move when at Karaoke night at Barefoot Bernie’s (Tuesdays if you’re in town) a guy with a bandana on his head and big black cowboy boots was wearing a tshirt that said, in plain white lettering “Livin the dream.” beneath a tour bus of some sort. He certainly was, and so were we.

Speaking of Karaoke…We unsuspectingly walked into Karaoke night at a bar called Barefoot Bernie’s. As we were walking up to the bar I attempted a Weekend at Bernie’s reference to no avail, my colleague was unfamiliar with the film. What should I expect? He’s from Lebanon. We took a table in the lounge directly adjacent to the Karaoke stage and promptly ordered nachos. I knew that sitting this close to the action is dangerous for several reasons:

First you have to be aware that you may have a strong urge to laugh at somebody who is taking their karaoke experience very seriously. Letting a laugh slip at the wrong time can create a moment of intense awkwardness. I knew I could handle myself if need be, but I wasn’t so sure about my colleague. I didn’t want to end up fighting some local because my associate laughed at his wife while she sang a tone deaf rendition of “Feel like a Woman” by Shania Twain. That is a risk I had to take.

Second, there is the off chance that nobody will come up to volunteer to sing and so the DJ or MC (Is there an official title for someone who runs a Karaoke night at a bar? Should there be? I think so.) will turn to the closest people (us) and insist, publicly, that we take the stage. This sets the stage for chanting and peer pressure at its worst and eventually culminates with me butchering (for the second time in my life) “You Oughtta know” by Alanis Morisette. Being forced to the stage is probably not very likely, but you need to be prepared.

Who the Fuck is Sammy Hagar?

Third, sitting close to the singers meant sitting close to the dancers which can be great, or horrible. Especially horrible if you run into a 40 something year old married woman with a one piece denim short-tanktop combination, the likes of which I have never seen. This woman told us repeatedly that her husband, whom she then pointed out to us in a booth in the corner, worked for Kenny Chesney and Sammy Hagar. By repeatedly I mean every five minutes over a period of an hour or two. She took quite a liking to my Lebanese friend but found, to her dismay, that he had no idea who Sammy Hagar or Kenny Chesney are. Every time she said (slurred) My husband works for Sammmmy Hagrrarrr, My associate would say “”Who the Fuck is Sammy Hagar?” and she would get pissed and shake her little fist at him and then make a strange grunting sound. After about fifteen minutes of this lady leaning on my colleague she attempted to kiss him on the mouth, and when denied showed us both her birthmark; a large brown circle covering the upper portion of her right breast. Awesome. I said. She made the grunting noise again. It was getting uncomfortable but I had taken the seat furthest from the dance floor and our be-denimed acquaintance so I was, for the most part out of the line of fire.

Denim-one-piece-lady had a friend, who coincidentally looked a lot like Sammy Hagar. This came in handy when trying to explain who Sammy Hagar was to my associate, but I still don’t think he fully grasped it. This lady said something or other about Cabo and meeting Sammy, but I wasn’t listening. I was busy taking pictures with my phone to send to coworkers in the office as my Lebanese companion let a drunk married woman lick his face only 15 feet or so away from her husband. We’re going to get our asses kicked I thought, and I’ll have proof that it is his fault.

Over the rest of the night Denim-Jean-one-piece lady was thrown out of the bar after stealing a beer from a bouncer (she had also stolen two drinks from my colleague utilizing a “if-I-stick-my-fingers-in-it-no-one-will-want-to-drink-it” approach earlier in the evening). She had to be physically removed by two men while swearing up and down that she would never return.
A short while later another girl admitted to us that she eats straight peanut butter out of the jar with a spoon. I thought I was the only one.

America...FUCK YEAH!

The next night we arrived at Cancun Cantina West excited to see if we could top the events of the night before. The bouncer was wearing a huge cowbow hat. The cocktail waitress who approached us was wearing a bikini and full leg leather chaps. Take my word for it…this is a good look for a girl who has obviously competed in a few Amateur nights at the local strip clubs. (Sidenote apparently there are no strip clubs in this part of Maryland. We asked the girl who ate straight peanut butter if there were any around town and she said that we would have to “go to West Virginia”, although, come to think of it that may have been a colloquialism for “go fuck yourselves”.)

Leather Chap girl informed me that I was the first person who had ever ordered a straight ginger ale from her in her whole life, so I had that going for me. We walked into the main lounge area and there before us was a spectacle the likes of which I have never seen: A huge, fully occupied line dancing dance floor. I’m talking 50’ by 40’ of parquet wood flooring that was packed with every imaginable age of person. There were legit 70 year olds out there in wranglers and Stetsons. Keep in mind that I had just been served by a girl wearing leather chaps conveniently cut away to reveal her ass. There were also younger people my age, and everything in between including a few older men; stragglers who seemed to dance with every woman there over the course of the evening. These lone wolves were all awkward looking at first brush but they could really fucking line dance man, I’ll tell you that. I suppose that women might find a man who can line dance sexy the same way they find an intelligent man, or a man with a lot of money and cocaine attractive. I’m talking sideburns, manboobs, and moustaches doing the “boot scootin boogie” with a hot 26 year old chick. I admit, I felt inadequate.

If you don't know the moves to "She Thinks My Tractors Sexy" you have no chance.

I had seen line dancing on TV before but my associate had never seen or heard of it. Keep in mind he is from Lebanon. He was entranced by the combination of the songs and the dancing. We sat and watched them dance, song after song, for a few hours. I’m not kidding. Just watching it all go down. Every now and then we would laugh, and say things like “Holy Shit”, and “Did you see that twist combination by the guy with the cutoff American flag shirt?”

I came across this video while looking for examples of line dancing on youtube, I find it amusing.

A Couple of points:

1) Line dancing seemed to put everyone in a good mood and created a very relaxed, yet fun atmosphere. As I mentioned there were probably grandparents and their grandkids on the floor at the same time. I would not drink with my grandparents at a line dancing bar, especially with my grandmother because she can pound and I would look like a pussy.

2) No one could explain to me how people knew what dance to do for each song. Apparently there is a specific, unique, dance that goes with every song that they play. People just swarm to the floor and without talking break into a fucking synchronized dance routine for 4 minutes, without any signals or talking to one another. They just know. Crazy, absolutely crazy.

3) While questioning a local girl about the art of line dancing my colleague told her that he was an illegal alien. This did not go over well.

Before the night was over, I admit, I tried to line dance. I do not like to dance in general, but I may never be in Hagerstown, MD again, in a place called the Cancun Cantina West with the opportunity to line dance. I was terrible, but I had a good time.

It has taken me time to process this all, and ultimately I now look back on my week in Hagerstown as a great experience. I had no preconceived notions of what the trip would bring, but it certainly improved my life in a small way. Just knowing that there are line dancing establishments out there makes me feel better about the whole American Dream thing because I am not sure there is a better example of the American Dream than a happy older couple line dancing on a Wednesday night in Hagerstown, Maryland. If there is than I have yet to see it with my own two eyes. Now some random music videos:

Ted Nugent is very American.

Mad Skillz is Sick...here's why:

Foil in the Oven: More from Jim's Epic Chipotle Visit

The handsoap on the bathroom sink has appeared to be completely empty for about a week now. Every time I finish going to the bathroom, I think "oh shit, I should have brought in a new thing of soap." And yet, every time it pumps out soap as if it were completely full. It's really amazing.

oldie but a goodie:


As you probably already know, Weeksy and I had a great meal at the Cleveland Circle Chipotle last Thursday. I'm a big believer that "you never get a second chance to make a first impression" is just as relevant to the relationship between burrito establishments and people as it is to the relationships that people have with each other. Because I believe this, I was happy to meet Jim and prevent him from making any rookie mistakes that might forever taint his image of this fine burrito chain. It's not that I think the burrito wouldn't have been good if he had gone with a different set of ingredients. But, someone who goes in with no prior knowledge is most likely not going to maximize their enjoyment. The corn is the best example of this. Thanks to Ted (who chaperoned me on my first trip), I have never had a burrito at Chipotle without corn. It probably wouldn't be bad. But, it would be lacking a certain element that I notice and enjoy every time I eat there.

Anyways, we've had a lot of burrito talk this week. I won't discuss any more about the food that we ate. You can scroll down for that. Instead, I want to rehash some of the sports conversations that we had during the meal.

Now, for those of you who don't know, Weeks is Jim from Green Bandwagon , which is a much more well established site than the roomofzen. He is a great person to talk basketball, and really all sports in general, with. Our meeting (I call it a staff meeting whenever I get together with the other people on the site) came the day after James Posey signed with New Orleans, which naturally drew most of our conversation to basketball. We sort of brushed over it, agreed that it sucked, agreed that we'd both like Tony Allen and Eddie House back, and moved on.

Some issues upon which we touched (note, some day we hope to have a podcast. For now, this will have to suffice):

Sick footage of a young Dimebag Darrell (see Ted's post two below mine). From Dimevision volume 1:



1) Michael Beasley: You're probably tired of hearing me rant and rave on my soap box about how Michael Beasley was the best player in this year's draft. Well, I'm not going to stop. Weeksy and I expanded on this for quite a while, and agreed that the Derrick Rose seemed to be a product of media hype more than anything else.

Here were the main points of our discussion:

A) The notion that the Bulls should take Rose because "this is a point guard league" is based on very flawed logic. Every expert who said that followed it with "take a look at what guys like Chris Paul and Deron Williams are doing in this league." Well, Chris Paul and Deron Williams are two of the best players in the NBA. Sure, if Rose turns out to be as good as them then it will all work out. But, even then, why is this a point guard league? I feel like one person said it, and then it just caught on until everybody was saying it. One of the biggest knocks on the Celtics heading into the season was that point guard was a weak spot for them. They won the NBA championship. The team they were playing against had a point guard that is old as can be.

Look at what Kobe Bryant, Tracy McGrady, and Dwayne Wade have done. Why isn't this a 2 guard league? The point is that you need to have a well rounded team in order to be successful. The Bulls have a very full back court, and have Kirk Hinrich locked up for quite a long time. It seems to us like Beasley would have made sense.

B) Everyone has knocked Beasley's defense, but again the media have allowed the legend of his defensive shortcomings to spiral a little bit out of control. We both watched him play quite a few times last year, and he never stood out to either of us as a guy that can't defend. In fact, we both think that he seems like he will do just fine playing team defense in the NBA. The best example of a college player who I knew would struggle playing defense in the NBA was Charlie Villanueva. He was very lazy about rotating, and seemed to always be on a different page than his teammates.

Now, Villanueva was a UCONN guy so I watched him play a lot more than I watched Beasley. But, I have seen nothing to indicate to me that Beasley will be a liability on the defensive end. He might not be an all-NBA defender, but he certainly has the ability to play team defense. And, when you add his offensive abilities to that, you end up way ahead of where you started.

C) Jim has the summer off, and has been able to take in more summer basketball than I have. He assures me that seeing what Beasley has done so far in the summer league only makes it more clear that he is going to be an impact player right away.

D) Do we even need to talk about the character thing more? Practical jokes in the locker room....every team has somebody who does them to some degree. As long as fire arms and lubricant are not involved, I don't think it's a problem. Of course, there is the switching schools thing. But, I just want to point one thing out. If any of us had changed high schools, potential employers might have legitimate reasons to wonder why. But, when you are an athlete like Beasley, coaches from other high schools probably call you ALL THE TIME to try and recruit you. And, unlike many of us, he actually had legitimate reasons to consider changing high schools. He was probably always on the lookout for the best place to get exposure.

At this point, we went off about how most guys that get passed for character issues despite freakish ability end up fine. We talk about how Warren Sapp went twelfth and Randy Moss went 21st.

We then keep talking about how absurd it is that Randy Moss went 21st.

"Didn't they watch him play? What the fuck is wrong with them? He wasn't human in college!"

"But, remember, he's so good that it doesn't LOOK like he's running fast."

"Yeah, but don't they have combine numbers? Isn't it there job to know if he's so good that he doesn't look like he's running fast?"

"Dallas passed on him. When has Dallas ever been worried about character issues?"........On and on we went.

As a side note, isn't it strange that Warren Sapp went 12th, Randy Moss went 21st, and yet Lawrence Phillips went 6th. Of the three, I really think Phillips had the most legitimate character questions. And, I think we can all agree that he didn't exactly "pan out".

Anyways, by the end we were sure that Chicago had made a mistake. Weeksy finished it of by saying "by the time the season is about half-way over, I think everyone is going to be wondering how they talked themselves into Derrick Rose."


2) Remember when the Bulls Refused to Part with Luol Deng?


So, somewhere in here I mention that Villanueva left college too early, and we get into guys who either left college early or should have gone to college. I assert that Gerald Green should have gone to college. He is extremely talented, but far too undeveloped. Unlike Beasley, who can find ways to score while being double teamed, Green doesn't know how to score when someone has him squared up. He may have developed this in college. The transition from dunking over high schoolers to the NBA was not a smooth one for him.

Anyways, Jim says that he thinks Deng could have used another year. He then says "remember how the Bulls wouldn't trade him last off-season no matter what?" For some reason I thought that this was the funniest thing. The Bulls faded into obscurity so fast last season, that their whole storyline was completely forgotten. But, remember how firm they were on not giving up Deng. Paul Pierce was out there in the spring. Kobe was out there until the fall. There were real chances for them to make a move there. But, they literally would not part with Luol Deng under any circumstances. It seems funny now, partially because I had forgotten all about it. Probably a good move for them. Kobe wasn't very good this year.




3) WEEI sucks.

This conversation was very refreshing for me to have. And, I have made a lot of changes in my life since it happened. I now realize that I was driving around in a prison that I created for myself. There are no laws that say I have to listen to sports radio when I drive, especially if it sucks.

We agreed on the following points:

- Dennis and Callahan barely even talk sports. I don't like listening to them. Some assert that it's because they are conservative and I am liberal but it's not (although they are very dismissive of opposing points of view). It's not. I have no problem with people that have different views than me. I do, however, have problems with people that advertise a sports show and deliver me something totally different.

- We like Dale and Holley. In fact, they are the only legitimately good daytime show on WEEI. And, for this, they are mocked incessantly by Dennis and Callahan and also by the Big Show guys.

- The Big Show is absurd. Weeksy believes that the Big O could be good at his job if he cared more about it. I'm not necessarily sure if I agree, but I do agree that he is a million times easier to listen to than Steve DeOssie, Fred Smerlas, or Butch Stearns. I can't handle Tony Masserotti either. We both remembered the spring of 2007, the day after Paul Pierce had made statements that he didn't want to be part of the rebuilding process, when it was very clear that nobody besides Ordway had any idea about the state of the Celtics. Now, granted the people they had on were baseball and football people (I believe Smerlas was on because it was draft weekend) but IT IS THEIR JOB TO BE ABLE TO TALK ABOUT THIS STUFF!

And the Whiner line, the goddamn whiner line. It sucks. It's not funny. It's the same people saying the same shit every day. Jim thinks it could work as a weekly thing, maybe every Friday. I'm willing to concede this. Some of those jokes might be less not funny if I only heard them once a week.

- Mikey Adams is entertaining. That's about all I'll say.

Here, I mention that the Big Show guys mock Mike and the Mad Dog all of the time. It pisses me off because I know that WFAN is a much better station than WEEI. On top of that, Mike and the Mad Dog do a MUCH better job of talking sports in a knowledgeable way that reflects actual preparation. And, they talk about sports from all over the country. Weeksy agrees that Mike and the Mad Dog is far superior to the Big Show. I knew it already, but it feels good to hear someone who is a fan of all Boston teams say it.

Then, we wonder how in the world this could be the nation's top rated sports radio network. Sure, there are tons of Boston fans and they love their sports, but don't we have standards?

This is when I start to realize that music is a better option for me than Dennis and Callahan or the Big Show. I've been much happier since.

Roomofzen Deportes: Rafa vs. Martin O'Neil

I have to be honest and say when Liverpool first hired Rafa Benitez in the summer of 2004, I did not know too much about him. Sure I knew he had done well with Valencia, but I was skeptical of a Spanish manager coming to Liverpool and doing a good job. Boy was I wrong! At the time I was sure Liverpool would hire Martin O'Neill whose reputation was immense and had done incredible things at Celtic. Surely a manager who had experience in the UK would be better.

I think Liverpool got the appointment right with Rafa, not to say Martin O'Neill would not have done a good job, but I don't think he would have won the Champions League in his first season. The two managers, who I respect a lot, are now involved in a transfer saga. Gareth Barry wants to move to Liverpool, however, Aston Villa are asking too much in a transfer fee, 18 million pounds. I can understand Villa wanting to make a generous profit, but since they know Barry wants to move to Liverpool they feel they can ask more then usual. Here is Liverpool's best players reacting to hearing he might Gareth is coming to Liverpool:


Liverpool are going in the right direction, however, they have a strong nucleus of Spanish players and will only compete for more trophies if they add some veteran premier leaguers in Gareth Barry and Robbie Keane. That would put them over the edge and allow them to win what every fan waiting for: The English Premier League Championship. I will leave you with a funny video of Liverpool players protesting a game being canceled because of the weather by using the authority responsible as target practice:

From Ozzfest.com....

Hot off the press, courtesy of Nick:

News
OZZFEST 2008 TO INCLUDE ALL-STAR TRIBUTE TO LATE PANTERA GUITARIST "DIMEBAG" DARRELL ABBOTT
WED JULY 23 @ 10:08 AM

From: News Posted: about 23 hours ago MEMBERS OF HARD ROCK COMMUNITY INCLUDING OZZFEST 2008 TALENT, FESTIVAL ALUMNI AND OTHERS BAND TOGETHER TO REMEMBER THE REVERED TEXAS NATIVEHard rocking music fans headed to this year’s OZZFEST will experience a special one-time only all-star tribute to fallen Pantera guitarist and Texas native “Dimebag” Darrell Abbott as part of the Saturday, August 9 one-day stadium spectacular at Dallas’ Pizza Hut Park.

The tribute to “Dimebag” Darrell will feature Abbott’s brother, Vinnie Paul, (acting as musical director and playing drums) along with an array of prominent hard rockers. This not-to-be-missed performance will salute the acclaimed guitarist whose December 2004 murder while performing onstage at a Columbus, Ohio club still has the hard rock/metal community reeling.Artists already confirmed to honor “Dimebag” Darrell Abbott include Kerry King (Slayer), Jerry Cantrell and Mike Inez (Alice In Chains), King Diamond, Scott Ian (Anthrax), Kirk Hammet (Metallica), Jamey Jasta (Hatebreed/Kingdom of Sorrow), Chad Gray (Mudvayne/Hell Yeah) and Bob Zilla (Damageplan/Hell Yeah). These musicians will stand together onstage, following Hell Yeah’s mainstage performance, to pay their respects to their fallen friend with a set including many Pantera classics. “Dimebag’s” longtime partner Rita Haney – who has worked tirelessly to keep his spirit alive – organized the tribute along with OZZFEST organizers.

While this began as an OZZFEST idea, Rita aggressively pursued it and brought together the talent making this homage a reality. “To have this event on the Mainstage at OZZFEST in Dallas is such a treat and an honor!” says Rita Haney. “When this tragedy originally happened, I saw the music community come together like I've never seen before. To have the name ‘Dimebag’ still, to this day, unite musicians to pay homage in such a respectful way, is very overwhelming! In Dime's vision, it's always been about a damn good time!"“When we decided on Dallas as the site for this year’s OZZFEST, it seemed like the perfect opportunity to pay tribute to ‘Dimebag’ Darrell since it was his hometown,” said Sharon Osbourne. “’Dimebag’ was a part of our OZZFEST family and everyone in the metal community misses him dearly.”Sponsored by Affliction Clothing, this year's OZZFEST stadium spectacular in the hard music-loving state of Texas will feature non-stop talent on three stages--the OZZFEST Main Stage, the Jagermeister Second Stage and the Monster Energy Texas Stage--as well as reliably twisted side attractions.

The bill will also feature some of the hardest rocking bands--many of whom have been a part of the OZZFEST family and who will return to the OZZFEST stage in support of a festival which has opened the door for so many of today's hard rock and metal bands. The full main stage lineup will spotlight performances by Metallica (in their OZZFEST debut), Ozzy Osbourne (in his only U.S. concert appearance through the end of 2008), Serj Tankian (System of a Down), Hellyeah, Jonathan Davis (Korn), Cavalera Conspiracy, Shadows Fall, Apocalyptica and In This Moment. Acts on The Jagermeister Second Stage include Sevendust, Devildriver, Kingdom of Sorrow, Soilent Green, Witchcraft and Goatwhore. The Monster Energy Texas Stage--"an homage to the many great metal bands that come from Texas," says Sharon Osbourne--will feature The Sword, Drowning Pool, Rigor Mortis, Within Chaos and The Destro.

Happy Birthday Slash II

Guns N' Roses - Nightrain - Live At The Ritz 1988

"Half Man Half Beast"

Happy Birthday Slash

July 23, 1965. SICK.

Another NFL Scandal Developing...

The Goddell Era is now officially the NFL's Cheating Era. From a prominent Viking's blog:

"a source said Favre had continued to use a Packers-issued cell phone and that when the team checked the phone records it found “repeated calls to coach Brad Childress and offensive coordinator Darrell Bevell.”"

Furthermore:

"The Vikings, if found guilty, could face penalties that include loss of draft picks and/or fines."

This saga is getting more and more interesting. Did Favre call these guys intentionally, knowing that he would be caught and the Vikings punished for "tampering" with him? Was this a way to preclude him from getting traded to Minnesota so that the Packers could save face? Or, was Favre a complete and total idiot, ruining his chances to play for the Vikings? My sense is that option b is much more likely. Favre is a total idiot.

What makes this wrinkle interesting is a few things:

1. The Vikings have repeatedly said Tavaris Jackson "is their guy no matter what." In fact, Childress has gone out of way numerous times to say this, if only to reassure his QB that he has the starting job, confidence of the coach, blah blah blah.

2. Hot on the heels of SpyGate, this allegation gives Goddell an opportunity to crack down on cheating. Tampering with players, and this is a perfect example of it if the allegations are true, is cheating and cheating is what Goddell needs to fight right now. At least from the standpoint of public relations, if you ask me. So will he go the extra mile to punish the Vikings if these allegations are true? Goddell's credibility is frankly on the line right now. After handling Spygate so poorly and basically covering up the entire goddamn thing, the NFL needs draconian measures to clean up their perception of being able to effectively police the NFL and enforce it's rules. If Godddell tries to cover this one up, what will the fans think?

My Trip to Chipotle

Regular visitors to ROOMOFZEN know that I recently announced my intention to make my first ever pilgrimage to Chipotle. Upon reading the post asking for advice LaRocque offered to meet me at the Cleveland Circle Chipotle in Boston.

Couple of factors to consider:

1. I received parking tickets during my last 2 visits to Boston. One was due to a misunderstanding of how late Boston's meters are monitored. The other was out of sheer disregard for parking ordinances during the Celtics rolling rally. However, this did motivate me to seek out free parking, which will be important later. As a side note people who spend their days giving out parking tickets probably hate their lives. I believe this strongly.

2. I was a little nervous about the Cleveland Circle meeting place due to the number of Bowdoin graduates who frequent the area. I did not want to be derailed by some random acquaintance that would not understand the importance of the Chipotle visit.

To satisfy my quest for free parking I found a spot on Washington Street. Those familiar with the Boston area are laughing at how far that is from Cleveland Circle. Still I made the ten-minute walk, with plenty of time to spare. In fact as I rounded the corner into Cleveland Circle I saw a number of class of 04’ Bowdoin grads. I made brief eye contact with one and kept moving at a steady clip to avoid the aforementioned acquaintance derailment. I found the Chipotle and then walked a good 15 minutes beyond it to kill some time. And then it got dicey. Just as I was about to turn around and head back I ran into a girl who if she had her way would be a friend of a friend. I hope that makes sense. Well she talked to me for about 5 minutes and even called a mutual acquaintance before I could say a word. Right there in front of me the dream was dying. Thankfully she got the answering machine and was on her way shortly. I hung back for a bit so as not to go to the Chipotle with her and possibly ruin everything. Of course she was a neurotic speed walker and I am, well I'm not. I headed back to towards the Chipotle and met LaRocque right on time. Once inside he took charge and ordered a burrito with the following:

chicken
black beans
Mild salsa (a must because of the diced tomatoes)
a little bit of hot salsa
sour cream
corn (can't skip it, it can make or break your burrito)
cheese
lettuce
guac (extra charge, but can't go without it)
chips and guac on the side

I simply said, “I’ll have what he’s having.”

My Chipotle Experience:

- I thought LaRocque was a regular because the guy behind the counter said, “Hey buddy how are you?” Then he proceeded to use variations of that greeting with every other customer. Only the “buddy” was constant.

- However, I soon realized I was with a pro regardless of what the guy behind the counter said. LaRocque explained that the good people at Chipotle, for whatever reason, choose not to mix the burrito ingredients up as the make the burrito. As a result the rice and the chicken are in different compartments if you will. This is by far the biggest disappointment about the institution, which all things considering is a minor one. Yet as LaRocque noted on some occasions the burrito rips open due to the massive amount of ingredients they throw in it. On those occasions everything mixes together as they use a new flour tortilla. Unfortunately that did not happen with us. Yet it’s impossible to get that kind of insight from a novice.

- Towards the bottom third of the burrito I foolishly discarded the foil only to watch the entire thing fall apart. Obviously I followed LaRocque’s example and did not grab a fork or spoon. No problem. I had the side chips to scoop it up the remains. I bounced back from a rookie mistake with a little veteran guidance. As a side note napkins did not make the cut either.

- All first timers should go with a Chipotle mentor. This could actually be an incredibly successful advertising campaign for them.

- As I mentioned earlier, my car was not right outside. Nothing like a little stretch of the legs to recoup after a solid Chipotle outing.

Lingering Questions:

1. Does Taco Bell have any shot at this point? I can’t imagine ever going back there.

2. How was Babcock’s trip to the Hagerstown, MD establishment?

Addition By Subtraction?

I hoped that it would never get to this point, although I think I knew all along that it would. I still wasn't totally convinced that the relationship between Jeremy Shockey and the Giants was completely irreconcilable. However, if the Giants had allowed these circumstances to reach that level, there's no telling what damage may have been done to this team and their quest to repeat as Super Bowl champions.

I can't say enough about what Jeremy Shockey has done on the field for the Giants. He is one of the most dangerous pass-catching tight ends in the NFL, and an even more effective run blocker. A four-time pro bowler, Shockey has perennially been considered among the elite class of professional tight ends. His accomplishments speak for themselves. But what I will miss most about this player, and what I believe will make it difficult for many Giants fans to accept this move, is the emotion that he brought to the field every Sunday.

It's hard not to like Jeremy Shockey when you watch him play. The image of him fighting for yards against the Eagles in Philadelphia after losing his helmet is one that will stay with Giants fans forever. This image really sums up the way Shockey played on gameday. He is an extremely tough competitor that always fought for every yard. There is no denying this, despite everything that has happened that may sour the way he is remembered in New York.




Unfortunately, in the National Football League, it takes more than just playing hard on Sundays. Everybody does that. In order to be successful, it takes somebody who puts winning and the good of their team ahead of themselves. It sounds corny and it sounds cliche, but it holds up. Just think about Terrell Owens.

In thinking about the Shockey situation, Owens kept popping into my mind. I think there are some clear parallels between these two players. Regardless of how you may feel about TO, there are two truths that you cannot deny: 1) he's an incredibly gifted football player and 2) He competes hard whenever he takes the field. The list of receivers with the ability to impact a game the way that he can is virtually nonexistent. Think about his catch in the final seconds to give the 49ers a three point victory over Green Bay. Remember the tears that came after. Remember him suiting up for Philadelphia in the Super Bowl on a broken ankle, and what it must have taken for him to perform the way he did in that game. You can't question how much this guy cares. That someone with his talent and drive would be run out of two different cities would seem very unlikely. And yet, as we all know, it has happened. Teams have cast TO out, and never seem to have regretted that decision for one day.

As I said at the start, what makes this tough to take is that things never got as bad in New York as they did with TO in San Francisco or Philadelphia. As far as I know, there is no video footage of Jeremy Shockey doing crunches on the news. We haven't hit rock bottom. However, in reviewing the way this thing has gone, I have little doubt that it was only a matter of time (of course, the details may have been different).

Let's review some reasons why I believe this was the right move for the G-Men:


- Behind the images of Jeremy Shockey as the valiant warrior who leaves it all on the field is the man who "accidentally" hit fans in San Francisco with ice in 2002, and gave us this quote in 2006: "we were outplayed, and out coached. Write that down." Outbursts and the deflecting of blame were staples of his time in New York.

- Throughout the 2006 season, there were rumors swirling about the negative affect that Jeremy Shockey was having on Eli Manning's psyche. He was allegedly berating him quite frequently during the second half of the season (probably the worst stretch of Manning's career). Many predicted that the offense would run more smoothly in week 17 against the Redskins because Shockey was not playing. These predictions were correct. The Giants won handily, in what was probably their most impressive performance of the season.

- 2007, week 15, Shockey breaks his leg in a Sunday night loss to Washington. I go to bed devastated. This had been a piss poor performance, and I thought that the Giants are doomed without Shockey. And yet, from this point on, they begin to play their best football of the year. They lost only one game during this stretch. In that loss, they came as close as anybody had to knocking off the undefeated New England Patriots, a feat they would accomplish 5 weeks later.

- After watching his team find their rhythm and win the Super Bowl without him, Shockey begins to demand that his role in the offense be changed. Logically, he was also suggesting that the offense itself be changed. He was calling for the Super Bowl champs to change their system to fit his needs. He wanted the ball more. Sound like anybody else you know?

- The Giants felt that Shockey was most valuable when he was used primarily as a blocker. He was unwilling to fill this role. More of the balls were instead going to Plaxico Burress, who had spent the off-season in New York working out and establishing a strong connection with Eli Manning. This connection paid huge dividends on the field (it has been reported that Steve Smith has also been working out with Manning this off-season, which is good news given Shockey's departure). Manning extended this same invitation to Shockey last off-season and the off-season before that. He refused both times, opting instead to stay down in Florida. This certainly did not help his case to get the ball more, and yet his demands were stronger now than they had every been.

- Despite all of this, players like Manning and Burress have reportedly gone to management to give Shockey their endorsement. Like me, it was hard for them to accept that this player, who adds so much on the field, wasn't right for this team. Management made a very tough decision, but it was for the best.



I don't mean to bash Shockey here. I think that he will be a star in New Orleans, where he will be reunited with Sean Payton. As he did in New York, Payton will no doubt line Shockey up in many different places on the field, and he will get him the ball often. Shockey will add another legitimite downfield threat to an offense that was already extremely wide open. On top of that, his blocking will help to improve the Saints' running game. I think he will be happy about having a fresh start. But, regardless of how well he performs and how happy he seems, I don't think we would have seen the same results from him in New York. The Giants were handcuffed here. And, as much as it hurts me to say it, I think this was the right move.