Roger Clemens: The Other Woman

Do not crowd the plate against the Rocket, Mindy.

.

I had almost begun to forget about Roger Clemens, but alas, I guess we're not that lucky. In the newest chapter of this strange and laughable saga is an alleged "relationship" that Clemens has had ongoing with Country Music artist (?) Mindy McCready, shown above after taking batting practice with Clemens in 2001. The claims have been brought out of the woodwork at the worst possible time for Clemens. One of the few shreds of dignity that he was left hanging onto after the release of the Mitchell report was his supposed "family man" image. It is tough to maintain such an image when there is an alleged adulterous affair with a 15 year old lingering in your past.

.

McCready's rap sheet is impressive; more or less what you would expect from a girl who rose to short lived Country Music stardom and then dropped off the face of the earth. If you don't yet own an Album of hers: congratulations. I can honestly say that I had never heard of her before this report surfaced, but then again, I'm not really up to snuff on who was opening for George Strait in the mid 1990s. But something about the story intrigued me, so I did a little legwork and by watching a few of her videos on YouTube, it is evident that McCready was obsessed with Roger Clemens, deriving her greatest inspiration from her life as his Gumar.

.

Take for example her heartfelt epic: "Maybe He'll Notice Her Now". In the song McCready spins the tale of a lonely woman who is taken for granted by her man. The images in the video draw heavily upon a woman sitting around in a nice hotel room waiting for a starting pitcher to arrive from his post game shower. Her distress is palpable, the song is terrible.

But that's just the beginning. McCready even draws heavily on the Steriod Issue to create her opus "Guys Do It All The Time". It is not that far of a stretch to say that what she is talking about is not going out and drinking and partying with the girls but is in fact a word by word transcription of a telephone conversation she had with the Rocket in 1995:

McCready: "So Roger, I hear that some of your teammates use performance enhancing drugs?

Clemens: "Yeah Mindy, Guys Do it All The Time."

McCready: "You're going to leave your wife right, you told me you were going to leave your wife...don't you remember?"

Clemens: "No, you must have mis-remembered."

The video (yes I really watched these) shows a pool scene that is eerily similar to the now infamous Jose' Canseco pool party. If you look very closely you can see a young Alex Rodriguez coveting a mullet headed Hispanic man's young wife. The Video even takes a shot at the side effects of steroid use by women as McCready is shown shaving her face on several occasions. This is clearly a shot at Clemens' wife, an admitted user of performance enhancing drugs. This is her way of saying, "Hey, I'm banging your husband." By the way, this song went to #1 on the Billboard Country Music Charts in 1996. Looks like Major League Baseball wasn't the only entity to have its statistics inflated by the Steroid Era.


Finally I came across the gem "All I want Is Everything". Apparently Roger did not listen carefully to this one. What does it take to keep McCready quiet? Listen and you will know; Cars, diamonds, you name it. How many men have gotten blackmailed by their mistresses via a country song? I guess you would have to be a dominant pitcher from Texas to have that on your resume.





Ultimately, we will have to wait and see how this all turns out. McCready will have her day in court (again). As for Clemens, no news is good news, and this is news. So, regardless of what comes out of this strange sideshow its not going to help his rapidly crumbling legacy, especially if McCready has any of the Rocket's "DNA" lying around on old tissues. For McCready however this opens the door for an amazing comeback, I'd say that the chances are very strong that we'll see an album from her in the next six months. Look for the singles "See...Guys DID do it all the time" and "I'm so Glad I could Help Ruin Your Life".